We. Are. Heartbroken....

This may very well be the hardest, most difficult post I've ever had to write.

I'm a mess. So this post may not be as fluid as it normally is, so please bear with me.

We still had not heard anything from our agency yet, so KC asked me to take a lunch, grab some coffee, and sit with him at work. So I did.

As soon as KC got into the van, I got a call from Michigan.

Our agency.

I just had a feeling it wasn't good news....

It wasn't.

MOWA issued a negative recommendation letter for us and the two other families waiting to travel this week.

NEGATIVE.

Apparently, 2 of our forms in our dossier had just expired. They want new ones. ALL new ones.

We have to re-do our Dossier. The 60+ page file of our lives: our tax information, income, physicals, background checks, home study... everything.

This was not an easy feat the first time around.

We will not be able to get what's needed, send it to Little Rock to be state sealed, send it to DC to be authenticated, get it back to our agency for review, and send it to Ethiopia for MOWA to review before Wednesday.

That means, that we will not be traveling until at least the end of October.

We cannot submit our dossier until the courts reopen the first week of October. We have no idea how long it will take for them to review it, issue us a positive letter, and then receive a court date.

..................................................

This, was never in the cards. This was a rare request that even took our agency by surprise. They saw an email from the team in Ethiopia and thought it was our court date.

I cannot tell you what it felt like to hear that from our agency. I all at once felt numb, sick to my stomach, and like I was going to pass out. Driving home was a feat and I thank God that I made it.

KC was angry - and just sat there quietly.

To be honest, I screamed out loud in the car as I was sobbing. I could barely breathe.

We were only days away from seeing our girl. ONLY A FEW DAYS.

KC, me, our agency.....

We're all still so dumbfounded...

This truly was a rare occurrence... though nothing in our process has been "normal".

Even now, I can barely wrap my head around it all. I'm still in disbelief that I'm not scrambling to book airline tickets.

I honestly don't know what more to say. This was a huge blow.

I want to be angry with God. I do, I really do.

This wasn't supposed to happen.

But I can't be angry with Him.

I feel like a little kid, sobbing, and beating my hands against His chest, all the while He just holds me and lets me rage on.

He knows our pain. He knows the heartbreak that we are feeling.

I'm sure He's feeling it to.

I don't know what God is doing.

My tiny brain cannot even fathom what He has ahead for us.

We are hurting. And angry. And confused.

And as hard as it may be for my flesh in this moment, I will continue to trust Him.

Because He knows. He knows.

{For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time for my departure is near. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day - and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing. - 2 Timothy 4:6-8}


Please pray for us, that we can fight and keep and finish like Paul did, with faith.

  

  

SO Close!!!

Ok friends. 

We've been told that the rumor is, that courts will be closing on August 6th.... That's in ONE week!!

Our agency is confident that we will make it in before the courts close. 

We were hoping to hear something by now, but we haven't. As soon as we get clearance, we will be traveling within a day or two!!

Crazy. 

We're so excited! Please help us pray that we hear something tomorrow. KC and I were antsy all day today. 

This part of the waiting has been torture. We are just a phone call away from jumping on a plane to meet our girl. 

And, a HUGE, MASSIVE, GINORMOUS thank you to all of you guys. We shared that with airfare prices skyrocketing, we were still about 2300 short. Well, you guys came through for us in less than 24 hours. I sobbed, and sobbed. 

You have no idea how much you mean to KC and I. We can never thank you enough for helping bring her home. 

Thank you. ❤️

*I've created a Facebook group to update you guys while we're in-country. It'll be easier than keeping up with the blog. (But I'll be sure to let you all know when we're leaving.) The group is Bring Bertie Home. 

https://m.facebook.com/groups/255540464635566?ref=bookmark 

Plan Q

Whelp. It's amazing how much our plans can change when we give everything over to God. 

When we started out on this journey to adopt from Ethiopia, we knew we'd be taking 2 separate trips to see our girl and then finally bring her home. 

At one point, we considered switching to South Africa but decided against it because we'd be required to stay in-country for 6-8 weeks. 

Last month our agency told us that they were considering offering the option of 1 trip consisting of 4-6 weeks. We'd be able to take custody of Bertie after we cleared court and spend bookous of time with her. 

But, we quickly dismissed that option. We thought it just wasn't feasible. Thought. 

So here we are, about 5 weeks away from traveling and we contacted a travel agency regarding airfare because we were told prices double in the summer. 

It's true. We were expecting to spend 1200 and now we're looking at 2500 A PIECE. 

Talk about a kick to the gut. KC and I talked about it and then thought it might be cheaper to stay in-country. 

So he asked me to run the numbers. And we were amazed. It really WILL be cheaper to stay in-country! 

We've been told we could be there up to 6 weeks, but we're praying it's shorter, as we've seen some families come home after 4 weeks. 

This DEFINITELY changes SO SO much. 

A. We'll be in a foreign country for at least a month. 

B. We'll be away from our boys for at least a month. 

C. We'll be with our newly adopted daughter for at least a month in a foreign country. 

So this is just to update family and friends. If anyone has any tips or advice for staying in-country, please share them. We'll take all the help we can get. 

KC and I are a bit nervous about leaving the boys for so long, but we're also excited about spending time with Bertie in Ethiopa. I'm pretty sure the boys will be fine chilling with grandparents and aunts and friends. Lol. 

This is was a quick change and we're still digesting it all. I've been pretty emotional the last day or two, so please be prepared if you encounter me in the next few days. Haha!! 

We'll let our agency know next week and they'll be able to give us more information and more details. Please continue to keep us in your prayers as our journey takes an unexpected yet exciting turn.  ❤️

  

  

Exciting news & one step closer!

We just got an email from the embassy in Addis. They’ve set up an interview with the “birth parent/relinquishing relative/other”. This is the final step before they issue their determination to USCIS back here in the states.

*cue squealing, screaming, and little bit of nervous breathing and staring into space*

 

We don’t have an exact date yet, but they could send their decision back here in the next week or two! As soon as that happens, we’ll get our PAIR letter within 10 days.

 

And then it’s only a matter of weeks before we travel. It’s getting close!

*cue squealing, screaming, and little bit of nervous breathing and staring into space*

 

And to be completely honest, we’re (or at least I) getting a little nervous. It's finally here... 

!!!!!!!!

 

There have been a lot of changes for us in the last few weeks. Good changes. Changes we’ve been praying about regarding our work situations. So please help us continue to pray about these things.

 

Also, we’ve been given a great opportunity coming up in about 2 weeks. I can’t give it away yet, but it’s a pretty big deal to us. I know, I know – I’m being terribly cryptic, but it’s adoption/travel fee related. We’ll share some more information about it later this week/next week, with maybe a little “sneak peak”!

 

The embassy will email us when they’ve sent their decision back here to NBC/USCIS. As soon as they do, we’ll be sure to let you guys know!

 

Thank you guys for all your prayers!

  

   

And it’s off!!!!!

A little backstory for you:

 

I called USCIS this week to see if they had received the Request for Evidence our agency sent on April 24^th. As of Tuesday, they had not. Our USCIS/NBC caseworker suggested we resend it as “it’s likely lost in the mail”.

 

I called our agency to request that they resend it Express Mail. Our coordinator told us they received a letter that it had been received and we should give ituntil Friday. KC and I agreed.

 

Yesterday, I called and left a voicemail for our caseworker to let her know I’d call her back on Friday or Monday to see if they found it. KC and I figured our file would be sent over next week at the absolute earliest. We were kind of bummed, but it would only set us back a week or two, which is really nothing in the grand scheme of this whole process. Ha!

 

And then this morning, I check my email and see this:

 

From: "Addis, Adoption"
Date: May 8, 2014 at 9:00:36 AM CDT
To: "Sandia Collins"
Subject: Notification of Receipt of PAIR Filing from USCIS

 

Yeah. I honestly think my heart stopped for a few minutes. I instantly thought, uh, no friggin’ way! I just talked to her Tuesday and left a voicemail yesterday! It can’t be… can it?

 

So before I got too overly excited or told my husband, I immediately called our coordinator at Bethany only to remember that Miss J is off on Thursdays. Boo. SO I call our local social worker to see if she can get me one of the other Ethiopia team members and she gives me an email address. To which I forward the email with the question of “Does this mean what I think this means?!”

 

Miss C’s reply?

 

{Yes your case has gone from UCSIC onto the Embassy in Ethiopia for their investigation of the orphan status I-604. Big step, good news!!!}

 

I immediately forward the email to KC and text him to call me. He calls me and, much to my excitement, shows the proper level of enthusiasm at this BIG step. Pretty much the last BIG paperwork step before we travel!

 

Here’s our final steps:

 

1.       The US Embassy will take 2-5 weeks to make a determination and issue our PAIR letter

2.      We upload our PAIR letter to our coordinators at Bethany so they can

let the Ethiopian office know to get us a court date – those are normally 4-6 weeks out

3.      We travel for 1^st court date

4.      We come home and wait for Embassy court date – those are normally 2-4 weeks out

5.      We travel for our 2^nd court date

6.      WE COME HOME WITH BERTIE!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Guys. Guys. GUYS. This is HUGE. I honestly freaked out and was shaking I was so excited. It’s been SO long and I cannot believe it’s finally here! For those trying to add it up, at the absolute earliest, we could travel in 6 weeks. That would put us around June 20^th. At the absolute longest, we could travel in 11 weeks. That would put us at July 24^th.

 

God has been so good to us, and we’ve been clearing so many hurdles so much quicker than we thought. So, we’re praying we’re traveling at the end of June! We are ready to meet our baby girl!

No word yet but….!

So I called our case worker at the NBC Immigration office. She has not received our updated information from our agency yet. We’re praying they get the updated information sometime this week! We’d love for our file to be sent over next week.

 

BUT....

 

I asked her about timelines. I asked her if she knew how long it would take once our file was in Ethiopia for final review. Her words:

 

Officer H: “We don’t really have a set timeline. Sometimes we get them returned in 2 weeks, sometimes they take 45 days. So we don’t know until we get them.”

 

So to clarify I said:

 

“So it could be only a few weeks?”

 

Officer H: “Yes, but likely it could be…”

 

Me: “Maybe 4 or 5 weeks?”

 

Officer H: “Yeah. That’s probably more accurate.”

 

I then thanked her, hung up, and promptly called the Mister.

 

THIS. This is good news. We were under the impression it could be 6-12 weeks once our file is in Ethiopia. But after talking with Officer H and our social worker last week (who told us she’s pretty confident we’ll travel before the courts close in August and to confirm timelines with Officer H), KC and I think that it’s VERY VERY likely that we’ll travel for our first court date by mid-summer!

 

AND very possibly sooner if we’re the lucky ones who get approval within just 2-3 weeks! But hey, I’m happy with even getting approval within 6 weeks!

 

I’ll keep you updated as soon as we find out when our file gets sent over to Ethiopia! Please keep praying that we travel by July. We want to bring our girl home!

By the way, you know you're an adoptive mom when your bag is stuffed with immigration letters, travel vaccination FAQ's, and pictures. Lol. 

 

 

 

In awe.....

Today, I decided to add up what we have paid towards our adoption (and what's left) and put it on one of those nifty little fundraiser thermometer things.

I sat here, staring at the screen for a good 5 minutes.

The amount was so huge. The amount is so huge.

But thanks to God and many of you, we made it.

When it's all said and done, we will have spent almost $30,000 on fees, processes, and travel.

I'm blown away. COMPLETELY blown away.

I see this number, and I know it was nothing that KC and I did on our own.

Nothing.

God has been so tremendously good to us. More than I could ever say.

And you guys. Oh, you guys.

You have done nothing but supported, prayed, cried, and rejoiced right alongside us.

You are our village.

And we cannot thank you enough for what you have done.

When I see that we have paid $21,600 in fees and we have $4,800 already saved up for travel, that final $2,500 doesn't seem so daunting.

So thank you. My beautiful friends with humongous hearts.

And thanks to God, for helping us every single step of the way.  <3

Some new news!!

Great news guys! I just spoke with our new coordinator Miss J. Today, she mailed off the items that NBC (USCIS) needed for our files!! It only took them 3 days to get everything gathered.

I’ll call NBC next week to make sure they received them and that they are what they’re needing. Please help us pray that they don’t make us re-do anything again. Our agency is pretty positive the paperwork is as clear as it can be.

All we’re waiting on now is for NBC to send our file to Ethiopia for determination. That’s the part that takes 6-12 weeks. And then that’s it! We get our PAIR letter and then we’ll be scheduled for court! Court is normally scheduled about 4-6 weeks after PAIR approval.

Eeeek! As long as we take our first trip before the courts close in August, I will be ONE HAPPY MOMMA! Of course, I wouldn’t mind if we got to travel at the end of June or in July either.  ;-)

We gotta kick it into high gear and bring Bertie home!

(sorry for all the exclamation points, lots of excitement going on here people!)

Here's a snippet of our convo:

We ALSO found out that during our first trip, when we come back from the north (where she is) to Addis Ababa (the capital), she gets to ride back with us!!!

She'll be with us for the 6 hour car ride back to Addis where she'll be moved into a temporary orphanage until we bring her home. 

We get 6. Whole. Hours. On top of the few at the orphanage. She'll at least know who we are and won't feel like she's being kidnapped by white people. Lol. 

KC and I were really excited to hear that! This has been a good news day. So keep those prayers comin' friends. ❤️

  

  

It's all fun and games!

Ok friends!

Bertie's suitcase still has plenty of room for names!

In the words of Gru, 'wellllll here's the deal-i-o'.... 

From now until May 9th, anyone who donates to help us with travel costs will get their name put into a drawing. Any donation. Any amount. Easy peasy right?

The winner will get to choose from:

1. Four complimentary passes to Malco theaters graciously donated by Malco. These are good for any of the Malco theaters in the US. 

OR

2. An Arkansas cookie cutter (with sugar cookie recipe) and love Arkansas recipe cards graciously donated by Swankie Sooie. 

Just go to the PayPal donate button on the left side of my blog! 

If your viewing from a mobile device, here's the direct link:

Collins Adoption - Donation 

(FYI: it will show up to with my personal email address as the "person" your giving to)

Good luck! Maybe one of you will grab #2 for your Mommas on Mothers Day! :)

(PS! Be sure to send me an email at collinsadoptionfund@gmail.com to let me know you've donated!)

No new updates makes for one antsy Momma...

Well that title pretty much sums up everything we know right now… which adds up to about diddly squat. We’re still waiting on our PAIR letter but we have not gotten confirmation that they received our application. I was really hoping we’d have that by now.

 

I know we’re still done finished with the waiting game, but it’s getting harder and harder as the weeks go by. We were really hoping that we’d be back home at the beginning of June with her. But that’s looking less and less likely as the weeks drag on.

 

I say ‘BOOOOOO!’ to that.

 

Thus, we are in  what I like to call “waiting purgatory”. It feels exactly as dreadful as it sounds. Another phrase is “radio silence”. Oh yeah. That’s where we’re at.

 

I guess even with all the lack-of-news, it could be worse. I still haven’t begun freaking out. Or crying. Or binge eating. Or sobbing. Or overindulging pizza…. You get my point. There were a few (okay, multiple) times during this journey that I admit, were. not. pretty. I mean, they were downright ugly.

 

So I’m in this place of gah-pretty-please-can-we-just-hear-something? And I-just-want-to-hold-her-and-meet-her-already, but it’s actually pretty subdued.

 

In lieu of being in “waiting purgatory”, we’ve been trying to keep busy. We have a garage sale coming up this weekend, we’re still working on Bertie’s room, we registered Oliver for kindergarten… life still goes on even though Bertie is halfway across the world. I’m trying to stay in the present and enjoy every minute with the boys. It’s going pretty good actually!

 

So to sum it up: Gahh!! I hate waiting! This is hard!! But seriously, it’s not too bad.

 

Does that makes sense? Haha!

 

Annyyyywhhhoooo.... Moving on… 

We’ve still had people ask what they can do to help. Well, there is still a lot of room for signatures on her suitcase! If you donate any amount to help bring her home, you can sign her suitcase (or we can do it for you). This is something we will put in her room as a reminder of everyone who fought alongside us to bring her home.

 

Please understand, it is hard for us to swallow our pride and ask for your help, but we are so close to the end of this! We have a lot saved up for travel, but will need more. I posted 2 weeks ago about talking to our coordinator during our travel prep call.

 

We found out Bertie is in an orphanage in northern Ethiopia (Wuchale is the area) about 6-7 hours away from the capital.  That is where we have to travel, after landing in Addis, to meet her and attend court.

 

Anything you can do is a blessing. Even your prayers are appreciated and needed. The link to our paypal account is in the upper left hand of our blog.  ❤️

 

{If you’re viewing from a mobile device and don’t see it, just click on Selah: The Art of the Pause at the top to go to the home page. Then, scroll down and select View Web Version. You’ll be able to see the blog like you would from a computer}

 

Again, THANK YOU. We love and appreciate you all SO much.

(I’m sure the words seem like they’ve lost their meaning, but I assure you they haven’t. )

Travel prep call

Oh yeah. A call dedicated to nothing but travel tips and information about our trip?! It totally happened. And I’m even more excited about going to get our beautiful girl! Now that we’re only waiting on the PAIR letter (for real this time. Lol.), I can give you more details on our trips. Well, as much as we know so far.

 

This is our first of two trips. Our “court date” trip. She does not come home with us on this trip. I know, really sad. Don’t talk to me about her after we come home from this trip unless you want snot on your shoulder. Just kidding! But seriously….

 

Our little girl is not in the capital city of Addis Ababa. She’s in a small village in the north. About a  6-7 hour journey from the capital. On this trip, we’ll go to court in her region. Here’s a little idea of what it’ll look like when we land:

 

1.      Chill in Addis for a day

2.      Travel to her area – stay overnight halfway there

3.      Hang out with her and other kiddos at the orphanage

4.      Go to court

5.      Pray we pass court and they do not need additional information

-          If we pass court, she may travel back with us to the capital (please this one!) or follow us a few days later to our agency’s orphanage for children who have passed court

6.      Head back to Addis

7.      Fly home and wait for our embassy trip in 2-4 weeks

 

Of course, there will be some training, sightseeing, and market shopping thrown in there. KC and I – as coffee addicts that drink it all hours of the day or night – are most excited about the traditional coffee ceremony!

 

Here’s a video linkhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4zgoR_8UJY&sns=em

 

And some info from Wikipediahttp://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coffee_ceremony

 

While we get a day at the orphanage, we are not going to be spending time only with her. This is to protect her in case something weird happens at court and so that the other kiddos don’t get jealous. So we’ll have a lot of time with all the kids which I’m excited about. It’ll be cool to see how she interacts with others and give us a chance to see her true personality instead of being clammed up around weird white/brown people. Lol.

 

Our first trip will take longer than most families because her orphanage is so far away from the capital. Most of the orphanages our agency works with are within the capital or surrounding cities. So we’ll be there an extra day or two – probably a total of 6 days.

 

We’re excited that we won’t only be in the capital and about being able to see more of rural Ethiopia and travel where Bertie grew up. But longer days there means more money. Our in-country travel costs are tripled since we’ll be doing a lot of long distance traveling as opposed to only local trips. We’re working hard to come up with extra funds.  Therefore, if anyone needs their house cleaned, kids watched, dogs walked, etc., hit up the Collins clan! Haha! For serious though….. We aren’t above cleaning yo’ toilets.  😜

 

Even more exciting is that our first travel trip could be as soon as 8 weeks (if we get PAIR approval super-fast) or up to 14 weeks (if approval takes longer).

 

If you have any experience with international travel and have any tips, please email me! I’ve scoured Pinterest a hundred times, but adoption specific travel tips are few and far between. Any tips and advice would be appreciated friends! Our email address iscollinsadoptionfund@gmail.com.

 

Thank you all so much for everything! You are all so amazing.  <3

 

  

  

One big step closer

Finally, this afternoon we are mailing off the necessary paperwork in order to file our I-600 with USCIS. *let loose a big sigh*

 

Here is a list of our items we have taken care of:

 

            - Updated home study mailed to USCIS

            - I600 form filled out

            - I600 form and cover letter mailed to BCSI – this afternoon or first thing tomorrow

           

 

Here is what we’re waiting on now:

 

□ Verification that our case has been received by NBC office at USCIS

□ PAIR approval letter from USCIS - anywhere from 4-12 weeks (praying for a shorter time)

□ Court date from Ethiopian Embassy – 1^st trip

·         Then, we come home for anywhere from 2-4 weeks

 □ Court date from American Embassy – 2^nd trip

·         BRING BERTIE HOME!!!!!

 

There are so few steps left, but each one takes time. I have no control over any of those items. And amazingly, I’m not freaking out. Lol. I am a serious procrastinator – like SERIOUS. I am arsty-fartsy, lets-do-it-tomorrow, I want my house to look “lived in”,  and a lot of times, I just go with the flow, whatever happens, happens kinda gal.

 

BUT there are times that I know things need to be done and done correctly. And that side of me loves lists and deadlines; loves research; loves knowing what’s next; loves knowing what’s next after my next step and so on and so forth. Haha!

 

I once took one of those “Which Side of Your Brain Do You Use Most” quizzes. It said I use mine 50/50. And I KNOW it’s true. Poor KC – I’m either “eh, let’s do it later” or “get it done right this second!”. I’m sure I wasn’t always 50/50, but years of paperwork for an adoption will do that to you.  ;) 

 

Anywhoooo! We’re close guys. SO close. I’m getting so excited! And, it’s been almost 6 weeks since our referral and I have not had a breakdown yet. *pats self on back* I’m okay with the timeline. I know that I’d love to see her home by the beginning of June. So, that’s what I’m praying for. I’m going to God with that. And if you don’t mind adding that to your prayer list, our family would appreciate it.

 

To leave you all, I’m going to do a little photo dump. Just pictures of our life while waiting for Bertie. It’s amazing how much life has changed. We can look to the future. We can plan stuff! We can have a vacation after 4 years!! And she’ll be there with us. The boys are dead set on visiting Disney World again with Bertie. Oliver is set on visiting the beach for the first time now that she’ll be here.

 

Enjoying the beautiful weather on a Sunday afternoon

Hunting for Bigfoot (the boys are in a Sasquatch stage right now haha!)

Our "bait"

From Bertie's Shower

Tag the bag (er, suitcase)

Her closet!

Can't wait 'til she's here.  :))

 

 

 

 

Changing the timing or changing us

Hello from the adoption battlefront. Okay, that may be a bit much, but some days it does feel like that.  :-D

 

We updated you all last week in regards to our USCIS re-fingerprinting appointment. They had closed the day of our appointment due to the weather – even after we traveled 2 hours to get there. When I called our NBC officer, she suggested we “walk-in” since they were closed. Otherwise, the soonest appointment was at the end of March.

 

Hooray!

 

KC and I headed down to their office and they were able to squeeze us in! I joke it’s also because I helped the office translate in regards to a sweet couple there to renew their residence card. Tehehehe. KC told me “We sat in the wrong spot” (right by the window) because I kept getting pulled in to help translate. But I didn’t care. I was happy they squeezed us in!

So yippeeeeeee for good news!

 

Fast forward to this afternoon. We get an update from our coordinator. We’re still waiting on some paperwork from Ethiopia in order for our coordinator to submit our case for review and PAIR approval.

 

Boo.

 

Our agency also received  update timelines in regards to PAIR approval. Are you ready for this? Are you sure?

 

The shortest processing time was 86 days. The longest processing time was 229 days. The average was 125 days.

 

Ouchie.

 

That means, IF we’re on the shorter waiting end, it could be mid-May before we take our FIRST trip. We were hoping to take our second trip by the end of May to bring her home.

 

Not gonna lie, I let loose a BIG. GIANT. *SIGH* and a boo hoo hoo.

 

But luckily that was out of my system pretty quick. I think I’m handling cruddy news better each day!

 

I’m thinking most of those delays were due to the government shutdown and the holidays. So maybe the time will be shortened now that all that is over with. But, I’m also praying that God does something like this:

 

“What? 86 days? 125 days? Psh, nah. Here guys. How’s about 40 days?”

 

That’s what I’m praying for! Haha! And KC, being the sensible, level headed man that he is responded to my suggestion with this:

 

“We will pray that He either changes the timing or changes us. Lol”

 

To which I so cleverly replied:

 

“Lol. The former would be thuper duper exthiting!” (thank you She’s The Man)

 

Anyway, this has been a day full of good news and bad news. And yet, KC and I were able to take it all in stride. I’ll accept whatever He does – changing the timing or changing us. That doesn’t mean I don’t pray for one over the other.   😊

 

What will you choose?

Something, somewhere, has gone wrong for the millionth time.

 

·         Your kid gets sent home with a note (for the third day in a row) for disruptive behavior

·         Your youngest smashes his face into a doorknob and now has a shiner on his cheek

·         Bad  weather + schools close = a frazzled mom with less PTO time in her bank

·         Your dog escapes again

·         Changes at work mean more work time for less pay

·         Bad weather + 2 hour drive in said bad weather + overnight stay in different city + closed USCIS office = 2 frazzled parents with less money in their pocket and PTO time in their bank

·         You’re pants are too tight because (in the wise words of Gru) “sometimes [you’ve] eaten instead of facing [your] problems”

 

You get it, I get it. Sometimes, things go wrong; they don’t happen the way we want or when we want. And today. After discovering the next available USCIS appointment was March 19^th, I yelled at God. Well, first I cried THEN I yelled. Not out loud or anything, people at work would’ve thought I was crazy! (er, crazier!)

 

But in my head. I couldn’t help but yell “SERIOUSLY GOD! Enough. GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” (if you know me, you know exactly how I said that “Gah”)

 

But then, I realized in all the things that have gone wrong, there are so many more that have gone right. 

No matter how many times I tell myself that the bad is seriously starting to outweigh the good, that couldn't be further from the truth. 

The bad won't last forever. The delays, the additional paperwork, the processing times... Those will all pass. 

Don't get me wrong, it stinks to still have to go through all of this. But, we know who she is! I have a picture. It's real. There's a little girl waiting on the other side of all this red tape. 

I want her home. And I want her home now. I mean, who wouldn't?!

But we've crossed the threshold from CRAZY HARD WAITING to CRAZY WAITING. I think that's bearable. So far it is. 

So I'm choosing to keep the blessings at the front of my mind - nothing else. Because if you don't keep things in perspective, you'll allow all those bad things to take up residence in your mind, and once they're there, they won't want to leave. 

Take the time today, and make yourself find one positive from today. Only 1. But I bet if you think, you'll start to come up with more. 

Choose joy. 

Whether you're tired of hearing this phrase or not, it doesn't change the fact that it holds truth. 

Choose. It's your choice. Dwell in the negativity or delight in the positivity. 

It's your choice. 

Me? Well, He delights in me, and I know I delight in Him. ❤️