Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Six Impossible Things

Today I was still kinda somewhat worrying about sending off our USCIS paperwork and Dossier like God told us to. We will have a large payment due once we get to those steps - and we still have a ways to go. So I'm trying to be obedient, but the practical side of me is screaming "ARE YOU CRAZY?! You can't do this part yet!"

But after talking with KC and telling him that I'm praying like crazy that God would calm my spirit (because, quite frankly, I'm freaking out! Hence the intense pray session), he tells me to instead pray that God would show me verses of His provision and verses that show how He takes care of us. And that I need to linger on those verses instead of my own worry. So I decide I'm going to do just that. I whip out my trusty-dusty iPhone and pull up eBible. And I say "Okay God - show me". Well, that didn’t work so well. I think the verse was about lineage or something. Haha. So I took a deep breath, and prayed that God would lead me to the best verse. {I'd like to add at this point, that I'm weird. God very rarely gives me verses that would have spoken "perfectly" to most. He always has another way of talking to me that is unconventional to the masses.}

I pull up Ephesians. Then, Ephesians 6. Then, Ephesians 6:14. Well, the first word of the verse is at the very bottom of the page, so I have to swipe to the left to see the rest of it. So this is what I see in that first verse highlighted in blue: Stand. Then as I swipe to the next page, my eyes catch on verse 16 (not even the rest of 14) and I read "hold up the shield of faith to stop the fiery arrows of the devil". As I mull that over for literally 2 seconds, I see this scene in my head:

(Courtesy of Alice in Wonderland - most specifically, the version
of the mastermind known as Tim Burton. See her lovely shield? I
want one like that.)

That is one of my favorite scenes in the movie. And I knew that God was giving that specifically to me. The movie buff/Tim Burton fanatic. That nothing is impossible. That all I have to do is have faith; faith that will shield those "fiery arrows". What are those "fiery arrows" you ask? Doubt, confusion, uncertainty, "questioning God's character" - that's for those of you at Freedom Ministries. As I'm thinking all of this, my eyes are tearing up. Then I hear this line from a song on the radio "We wave our white flag. We surrender - all to You…" And suddenly I'm crying as I realize yet again:

A. God loves me SO much that He tells me things in a way that I will understand
B. God loves me SO much that even though I fail Him time and time again, He still takes care of me
C. God loves me SO much that He gives me reassurance through Tim Burton movie clips
D. God loves me SO much that He wants me to see that He is FOR ME
E. God loves ME so much…

Even though it's out of my character to do something that I don't feel like we are financially prepared for (anyways, who is ever completely financially prepared for adoption?  Lol), I'm sending out our paperwork. I'm trusting in Him to do the "impossible"; I'm asking Him to work a miracle.

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