Jump out the Window!

Last night we had a women's Bible study at church led by our Pastor Stacey. I love hearing her teach - so down to earth and relatable. I really wanted to go, but some stuff had come up that KC and I weren't expecting. So, I wanted to just go home. Ever have those days? You just want to go home and not do anything or be around anyone. Well, that's exactly how I felt yesterday. My spirit wanted to go - for the teaching, the fellowship - but mi cuerpo just did not want to cooperate. Finally with some great encouragement from KC, I decided to go. Well, in order to save gas money and not drive home, stay for an hour, and drive back, I decided to hang around Bentonville for 2 hours…. by myself. Yeah, TONS of fun. lol. I hated being left to my own thoughts, especially while having "one of those days".

I get to church half an hour early and talk with my friend Claire for a few minutes before heading into the sanctuary to find a seat. I sit in the back which was weird because we normally sit on the 3rd row. Study starts off with a bit of worship. Acoustic. My favorite. I'm trying to reign in my thoughts to focus on worship and am finally successful. Then Pastor Stacey heads up front and we begin Bible study. Now, mind you, there were a lot of fun and witty comments from her throughout this whole study. Making us all very comfortable and allowing us to relate to what we were studying. But, for the sake of time, I'm just going to tell you what stuck out to me.

Ever gone to church or Bible study after fighting with yourself about whether or not to go and when the service starts you know why? That was yesterday. As soon as she started talking about David and Michal I knew I was hearing exactly what I needed to.

In a nutshell this is what I heard from the teaching: God wants me to be an audacious and daring woman. Following Him on exciting adventures that I couldn't go on alone (hello adoption!). How is this accomplished you may ask? By remaining in the presence of God. By seeking out the presence of God. By making it your all consuming passion. By worship - in all things. (this was where it got real good)

Having a bad day? Worship Him. Going through something unbearable? Worship Him. Having a fantastic day? Worship Him. Being with Him in worship, being in His presence will get you through those seemingly impossible moments. "No issue is too great when you're worshiping in the presence of God." Don't take advantage of the opportunity to worship Him. Whether at home alone, or in a formal church setting. Don't take the opportunity to worship without persecution for granted. Feeling numb? Had an argument with your spouse right before church? Don't feel like worshipping? Do it anyway. Once you feel His presence, everything else will just melt away. He sacrificed everything for us. The least we can do is show Him our appreciation.

During the entire hour that we were studying, I found myself laughing softly. Why? Because He was talking TO ME! {Sandra, little darling, it's going to be okay! See? Just be with Me. Worship Me and I'll get you through this. Stay with Me. Stay in My presence. Always. I'll lead you through this adventure. I've called you to do it, but not by yourself. Stay in My presence and you'll do great things. For me. With me.}

Mark 5 tells of a story about a woman with an issue of blood. I'm sure we've heard this story many times. She had faith so she was healed. Yes, but that wasn't all. She knew that all she needed to do was be in His presence and her problem would be gone. Now, this isn't saying it's going to be easy. (what is?) She had to fight to get to His presence. The crowd. Exhaustion. I'm sure there were plenty of other things, use your imagination. It's His presence that will heal us - make us whole. In His presence we will be able to endure all that is thrown at us. His presence isn't a force field that will protect us from all hurt, pain, and misfortune. Rather it's a divine phenomenon giving us the oomph we need to continue on. [I prayed that God would allow me to convey how I felt about His presence and that's what I got.  :)]  A refresher. A time to renew our resolve to continue fighting.

He was telling me that I'm going to go through things. Tough, arduous, trying things. And in order to endure, I have to seek out the presence of God. Go where the presence of God goes. I need to jump out that window. Something Michal failed to do. She helped David escape her psychotic, bloodthirsty father by lowering him out the window, but instead of going where the anointing, the presence was, she remained. I don't want to  be left behind. I want to move forward. I want to allow the presence of God move in my life. I want that to be my all consuming passion. One of my favorite poems/sayings is by Amy Carmichael - a missionary from India:

(little tidbit, I'm getting this as a tattoo very soon!)

I want to step out of my "good and ordinary life" and do something adventurous with God. I want Him to know that I'm His girl. He has already revealed a few things to KC about our family and what He's going to have us do in the future. And let me tell you, it's DEFINITELY an adventure. Lol. The adoption - an adventure. An emotionally trying adventure. One we couldn't dream to do without His help.

As my friend Stephanie and I talked about it last night. I don't know what stage of life my sweet little Effie is in, but I pray for her constantly. I pray for God's anointing to be on her. For His presence to comfort her. While adoption is a great thing, it's something born of loss. By the time she gets to us, she'll have endured a loss few have experienced. The best thing I can do for her right now is pray peace and comfort for her. Praying for God's presence to be on her. And I know He will take care of her because He has already promised KC and I that He will.  ©

Psalm 3:2-3

So many are saying, "God will never rescue him!" But you, O LORD, are a

shield around me; You are my glory, the one who holds my head high.